Learning Styles, Leadership Workshops, and the Myth of the “One Right Way” to Learn
Why the most popular leadership programs don’t work for everyone
The best educators never stop being students. I may be a trainer and facilitator myself, but I still love to learn. As I say in my author program: If you want to become a better writer, start by reading more. The same applies for me. If I want to become a better coach and trainer, I have to keep learning. This is not just about new content, but discovering new perspectives.
That’s why I enjoy stepping out of my instructor and advisor role and into the student seat, to remind myself what learning feels like from the other side. It’s humbling, and often revealing. Recently, I was invited to participate in a masterclass program on leadership skills. It reminded me that not everyone learns in the same way, and that’s perfectly okay.
The program was very good. The facilitators were energetic, the discussions lively, and the time passed quickly. But I couldn’t shake a familiar feeling I’ve had in other programs like this: something about the format didn’t quite click for me.
The entire experience was built around group exercises and guided discussions, a “DIY learning” approach that’s incredibly popular in corporate training today. You’re not taught a concept first; instead, you’re placed in a scenario, asked to respond, and then guided toward the “right” conclusion.1 It’s engaging, sure, but for someone like me, it can feel a bit like being led through a maze when I’d rather have a map.
Not everyone learns the same way
Learning is different for everyone. We all learn in different ways. Some of us thrive on collaboration and hands-on experimentation. Others, like me, prefer to understand the why before diving into the how. Reversing that order seems like a waste of time for me. I like to learn from someone who has already mastered the topic: someone who can clearly explain the reasoning, and the framework. Don’t ask me to apply a concept before understanding it. Once I’ve internalized the concept, I’m eager to experiment and will probably adapt it on my own.2
I like to learn the “old-fashioned” way: through structured teaching that builds understanding first and application second. I find it frustrating when a program skips that step and assumes everyone learns best through immediate interaction.
Yes, the title of my blog suggests I live (and learn) by experience, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like to see a model, approach, or theory first, so we can then decide whether to give it a try (or not).
The networking myth
Conferences often promote “networking” as a key benefit. And while I enjoy connecting with people, I’ve never been comfortable with the idea of networking as a scheduled activity. It often feels performative: a flurry of small talk and LinkedIn exchanges that rarely lead anywhere meaningful. I have 10,000+ connections on LinkedIn, and every year they all send me the same canned message for my birthday. That’s not connection, that’s fake. For a while I tried responding to it by giving out my number so we could text, but few took me up on that offer.3 Maybe fake is safer, especially online?
The best connections happen naturally, through ideas and shared values. When you speak authentically, the right people find you. You don’t need to “work the room.” You just need to be real. For us introverts, that’s a relief.4
Learning and teaching differently
All of this made me reflect on my own approach to teaching. In my programs, I do things differently. I believe in learning through understanding first. You learn the concept, the strategy, the reasoning, and then you apply it through exercises and real-world practice. It’s simple, clear, and, most importantly, it respects how most adults actually learn.
If you’ve ever sat through a training session that left you thinking, “This is fine, but I’m not really learning anything new,” you’re not alone. And if you’ve ever felt out of place in a group workshop because you prefer structure and clarity before collaboration, my programs might feel like home.
Get Into Action
If you’d like to explore my approach to learning, one that values clarity, structure, and practical implementation over endless exercises, you can start with a free preview of any of my courses at Windmill Cloud.
Check it out: a preview costs nothing, and gives you a sneak preview to see if any of my programs resonate enough with you. Once you join, you can learn at your own pace, in your own way, and rediscover the power of learning that actually sticks.
